These Two.

I can always count on these two,

to remind me what matters the most.

Sunday Family Fun Day.

This past Sunday.

was the first day of Spring.

Sunshine.

Family.

Good food.

Fishin.

{Even in the dark!}

Below is cute little Caleb.

He points with his middle finger and it cracks me up!

Jeremys Uncle thats the same age as he {Chance}--& older brother {Josh}

Getting ready to eat {my fave part was Jeremy's moms potato salad, yums!}

Presh :) my parky playing with sand.

Who is that sexy fellow! MY BABY LOVE!!

{Poppa & Granny} fishing

{Nicholas and Nathaniel} jeremy's nephews.

Nicholas and Nathaniel--w/ their mommy Ashley} fishing!

{Parker and Granny} caught a fish!

At the end of the day.....

I looked up at this beautifully colored sky

and it hit me that God has truly blessed me with

such a wonderful man, and his family that cares so

much for Parker and I.

I love them all so very much!

--Allison Danielle.

It's my job to worry, right?!

So I have determined

it is a Mommas job to worry.

We worry when they're in our bellies.

Is he kicking enough?

Is he getting enough nutrients?

Is he facing the right direction?

Was that bath I took too hot?

Will he be healthy when I deliver him?

And then when they're born, we worry even more.

Is he growing enough?

Is he eating enough?

Why isn't he sitting up yet?

Should he be walking?

How long will this fever last?

Why won't he sit still?

And then now that hes toddlers,

my list of worries is magnifed!

Should I let him eat that?

How do I discipline him?

Why won't he eat meat?

or fruit?

or anything for that matter?

And I'm told "You're worrying too much..."

Right.

It's my JOB to worry.

In my other life.

Sometimes I lay in bed
&& in my mind I play the "what if" game.
Or
the "what would I do in another life" game.

What if I had made different choices?
..taken a different path?
..lived in another state?
..lived in another COUNTRY for that matter?
..waited longer to have a baby?
What if?...

Its not that I don't love the life I live...

because I do--very very mucho in fact!
Sometimes it's just fun to say,
in another life I totally would have_______...

My other lives:

NYC Girl.
I live in a small studio apartment with brick walls. I walk to work in 5 inch heels with my Starbucks hot coffee with my effortless style. I dine with important people every evening and we discuss current affairs because in this life...I read the newspaper. On the weekends I sit in cafe window seats and watch the passerby and wonder what kind of life they live.


Small Town Girl.
Not like the small town I live in now, but a small quaint town on the coast of North Carolina, like the ones you read about in Nicholas Sparks novels. My house has a wrap around front porch, fireflies and a tire swing. It's safe enough for kids to walk to and from school. There are festivals, bingo nights and bake sales. We take a weekly stroll on the beach every Sunday evening. I collect sea shells, read until I fall asleep on my front porch and have kiddos that play outside with sticks and rocks.


Travel Girl.
With nothing but a backpack, a camera, and a journal...I embark across the globe without a plan! A month in a small italian village, hopping Greek islands, surfing in Maui, and having some Eat, Pray, Love moments along the way. :-) Not a care in the world. Living life day to day.


That's it.

These are my "other lives"
Glamorous huh?
But even on my worst day
I would not trade the life I have.


Because while I am a dreamer,
I am a realist,
And I know that I can't have it all.
I can't be a world traveler, or a NYC girl,
small town girl on the beach, AND mother of the year.


When I was 18,
I thought I could have it all.

When I was 19
Me and Parker spotted the most
GORGEOUS guy that takes
the best care of us,
and I made my choice,

him.


and wherever that journey is going to take us. :-)


I love you JEREMY and PARKER.

My Birthday...In Pictures.

TWENTY FIRST BIRTHDAY!!!

and if you're wondering what my first legal drink was..

it was a Jack & Coke...from Outback.

My Jer Bear acting supa silly.

Myself, Vickers, Noel

Noel, Tina, Myself, Kelly

Me & Noel

Jeremy and Noel acting ra-tarded.

Frans.

Outback.

Tina not paying attention

Thanks to all who came to my birthday celebration and made it supa fun!!! <3>

I SHOULD be...

I should be doing laundry right now.

I should be cleaning out all of the left overs in the fridge from last week...

and the week before.

I should be cleaning period. In every room.

I should be trying a little harder to get this scribble drawn LADDER on my SUEDE couch out.

I should be pricing all of Parkers clothes for Dittos for Kiddos. Deadline is Monday. Haven't even started.

But most importantly I should be SLEEPING.

If I don't get my full 1293294 hrs of sleep, I am one ILL little momma.

&& if momma aint happy

aint nobody happy.

Instead I am blogging at 11:17.

I am blogging to keep my sanity. I am blogging to hold on to that last shred of time that is ALL mine.

Whats on my mind tonight?

{When am I going to try letting Parker sleep in underwear again?}

{When do other mommas start the overnight thing with their kids?}

{Is three too young?}

{Or am I way behind?}

Ahhhhhh!!!!

It's questions and thoughts like these that.....plague a mommy-in-training. This is something they don't prepare you for when you're pregnant. No one tells you that you will feel like the biggest failure, but the biggest success at the same time. No one tells you that you will feel helpless when you don't have all the answers. No one tells you about the overwhelming fear and anxiety you have for your childs health and future. No one tells you that about the guilt you will have when you lose all patience. All anyone tells you is {this will be the hardest thing you ever do.}

And then just when I think that I have nothing else to give--I remember this..

and this

and this

Then I do my best and snap out of it and remind myself of this saying

"Nothing worth having comes easy."

and I can tell you that, for me, there is nothing more worth than having my little family.

Bike Attempt #1

Our sweet upstairs neighbors MaKylie and his mom

Stephanie gave Parker a bicycle with training wheels.

So today, since it was nice out, Jeremy took Parker outside

to try to attempt to ride his first bicycle.

Notice that Parker is wearing a black flat bill,

a PJ shirt

blue gym shorts

and brown boots.

{He dressed himself}

Parker got VERY frustrated.
But its OK.
He'll get the hang of it.

Jeremy giving Parker a pep talk to keep trying!
...but he just wouldn't have it.

Poor beebee.

Life is like a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.

-- Albert Einstein

Almost My Birfday!!

My birthday

used to be all about presents,

and lots of them,

a special cake with lots of

sparkly candles,

balloons and streamers,

and being the

center of attention

for an E.N.T.I.R.E day.



and while all those things

are totally awesome,

this years birthday

is going to be just a

WEE bit different.



Im turning 21.

...In 3 days.